Thursday, January 15, 2015

Cutting Your Own Hair

Hello, friends. This is a short-story called, "The Day I Cut My Own Hair"

Every time I feel like being someone new, I cut my hair. I want to get over an ex-boyfriend? I cut my hair. (Dye it too, for good measure.) I’m starting graduate school? I cut my hair. I want to stop getting asked if I’m a student (which is the current reason)? I cut my hair. Only this time, I cut it myself. $60+ salon visit? Ain’t nobody got time for that! Plus there’s something intriguing about cutting your own hair… something that feels so 90’s grunge… so teenage rebellion, doncha think?

Step One:
Shower. Shampoo, Condition.

Step Two:
Comb wet hair. Pin back bangs.

Step Three:
Take (desk) scissors (woops.) Run fingers through left chunk of hair. Try to replicate what they do at salon. Snip off first two inches. Hold in mini panic attack that is rising in my chest. Re-run fingers through hair to see if the first chunk is even. Snip some more to make edges jagged and not look so I-just-cut-my-barbie’s-hair.

Step Four:
Dry first chunk. Make sure it doesn’t look like I lit my hair on fire or went through a washing machine.

Step Five:
It doesn’t look like I lit my hair on fire or went through a washing machine, so repeat steps 3-4 throughout head, separating my head of hair into five chunks- two on the left side, two on the right, and keeping my bangs out entirely. Dry each chunk separately.

Step Five:
Dry bangs. (Which I did not cut.)

Voila! 20 minutes later and $60 still in my wallet, I have a new ‘do.

Lol! That is literally what I did last night. Are you horrified?

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME AND THEN TELL ME YOU HATE YOUR NEW HAIRCUT.

To see a photo of my new hair, visit my instagram: mapleandmint!

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